These days . . .

are now to be yet there is something

. . . to be appreciated.

. . . I’d rather be thankful.

. . . a constant reminder;

Knowing only of emotions are the biggest part of me.

Knowing only music is nothing but the rhythm of everyday I dance to.

Knowing of loving memories that makes me want to see you again in my life.

Annie, Diana you were the ones that gave me up to my grannie Lillith.

To know maybe to the eyes of my own Emily.

Only to see Josie come to me and be that one who wanted none,

but of my friend I’d secure that I never once held to my bosom.

Loved every moment of some distant unrecognizable memories of her.

Yet of all,

that was there guiding me. . .

the years I need of. . .

biased of my own history. . .

You were,

you are,

will always stay.

In my way of wanting you came to me,

upon a 21st of what used to be ours that began never ended.

 “I love you”

was never fully uttered between.

We lived it each day in so many ways.



®Artsydhude 97-19

™XENOphagz, XenoGrapx


That’s the idea

“What’s love got to do with it” -Tina Turner


I tried your splendored ways.

I did your obsessive ways.

I looked for you once.

You found me as a friend and ended up again at that.

What must I do,

to gain your lust towards me.

Why can’t I have your touch,

you frenchy wenchy ways at my side.

Have I misconstrued and misunderstood what is that physical

and loving ways of yours.

Can you U

just tell me which one to give

and never stop.

Must I be always the one,

to see you in azure skies and green fields.

To know its not an intangible feeling.



®Artsydhude 97-19


To have u.

Leave me alone, love.
I don’t want u here in my mind.
I want and need you by arms,
by my lips,


the one who at will hold me tight,
the one who wioo kiss my troubles away.


the one who validates all of my emotions
and do take care of my heart.
To know I need your lips,
my hips,


horizontal or any kind of posish.
Thing is,
that is not love.
A lust for you,


not a love,
I do utter,
I may under and over you.

2 x the wha?(ima-ark:18)

Please me of my shame,

I want you to keep all the memory of my blames not of you,

to me and to me only.

So I know how I will put your insta on fb and will post none of it all,

for me only to love you of what you can be,

not the one who you are


Awaken me of me,

Love me of my screw ups, mistakes and all of my sins.

So be it.

Far it,

use it.

I dunnwannabe any Christ, 

or any of deity that people worship.

I want his love for you,

I want his all for you

Coz I loved you once,

will always be by you,

never once,

twice or even a generation of

hate and loathing.

Its not me,

It is not me,

I just want the one,

who needs my one and only love,

for every second of a year,

in a minute of all months,

every hour of a decade.

I once held you,

and told myself I will never let go.

Yes I am ready to let go,

not of you.

Yes I am ready to give up on,

not of you.

I have to let it to be me.

I can leave just like that.

Yet I am here,

nowhere near

anywhere but never

beside the one,

I need to be.

©OAM ®Artsydhude 2018

™XENOphagz, XenoGrapx

Stained to abstain.(year of love in ’18)

To me my love of you.

To me the heart of this eyes can not compare all of you.

Each one to remain where it lies.

Of the night and in questions whom want to know what jaundice stains where,

once there.

Yes no more of these,

thus an imbecile, 

lustful ignorant,

yet loved not just once.

So be it then,

In my promiscuity,

of what habit can,

or managed.

So it seems,

Homer once said,

 “Far it to be me,

judge me not,

so be it.

I will always do.”

 Will I ever do stop.

I dunno,

maybe when someone in my life,

day after day can say,

 “wanna go,

there is nothing to do,

no one here but us two.”




®Artsydhude 2018

™XENOphagz, XenoGrapx

Once upon (image of 2018)

Once upon a memory.

Lights of your eyes did love me.

No matter how much I tried,

too many times I wanted,

none to kiss and make love on the precious neck of yours.

none to hold and do love every sensation your body holds.

give you a bed of my efforts and make you u want me.

Only then a memory that we shared.

I do see that your love only loved,

what you need to do to me.

Once upon a touch,

melted this wretched attitude of mine,

all of my wrongness.

all of my shit self.

all that which were impossible. . .

in all of my mind.

in all of the years of unhinged and instability.

and the years were I even stable enough.

For what are memories when do keep your life,

not in check.

not moving.

even enough not to be heard.

Happily ever all those have never seen.

Happily ever after which will never be.

Happily wont see the light leaving my own shire,

As I step out from and to,

and the road ever into any,

a mountain of all my sea.



®Artsydhude 97-18

™XENOphagz, XenoGrapx

To honor with. . .


is to be a loyal dog which

is slavery is built on.


are nothing alike what we know of equality,

yet all wanted nothing but scorn and frailty.


to give back and never attained its nirvana.

to give back and still wont get any,

until all have humbled and fumbled,

in all the cultivation and civilization of 




®Artsydhude 97-18

™XENOphagz, XenoGrapx

The return.

Of soot and ash,

I will lay onto the gravel of these pebbles.

Of sand and shores,

that permeate the love of an infinite and unconditional.

Above the horizon of my skin,

there the hydra of my eye will bellow,

like  other than the sky below me.

And yes,

opened eye unto the void which is yours,

and only yours to keep as your legs twined my very soul,

in two and kept in tow.



®Artsydhude 97-18

™XENOphagz, XenoGrapx

Lustfuly yours.


your sense is not of,

yet to me;

It is.


Muy corazon may be yours,

not for a price,

not for a piece of;

then how am I to be.

Thine lips,

moist and gleaming with red glossy,

oh how i churn and turn,

Only a blink of yours makes me a puddle soon to be;

splashed around.

Oh your illustrious skin never leaves your side.

I am tempted and would be yours truly,

not a dog panting and humping,

not a tongue wagging and gagging by the look of your glances.

Oh mercy me. . .

Oh my sweet,

Can I be yours until,

. . .